NEWCOMERS
The hardest thing is the first step, to realizing there is an issue. To ask for help!
The information on this website is mostly from the official SLAA website.
If you would like to know more about SLAA and the SLAA organization as a whole,
this is the best place to look.
The hardest thing is the first step, to realizing there is an issue. To ask for help!
The information on this website is mostly from the official SLAA website.
If you would like to know more about SLAA and the SLAA organization as a whole,
this is the best place to look.
Welcome
Each of us in S.L.A.A. knows the confusion and difficulty of walking into the first few meetings, feeling like a newcomer in new surroundings. Whether we took this courageous step out of pain and hopelessness, sought relief from longing and emptiness, or were directed to attend, we move toward recovery by being here. We hope you will feel free to share with the group why you came to S.L.A.A. and you may also want to ask questions of individuals after the meeting. Among the first questions we faced when we attended meetings were:
Please take the time to answer these questions for yourself. For more information, see the pamphlets Introduction To Sex And Love Addicts Anonymous, Questions Beginners Ask, 40 Questions For Self Diagnosis and Anorexia: Sexual, Social, and Emotional These are available at most meetings and from S.L.A.A.’s international office, Fellowship Wide Services. We suggest attending S.L.A.A. meetings as often as you can. There are many kinds of meetings and each has its own personality. If you don’t find quite the right meeting the first time, we suggest attending other meetings. And as always: “Take what you like and leave the rest.” |
Where Do I Start?
What is Sex & Love Addiction? We in Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous (SLAA) believe that sex and love addiction is a progressive illness that cannot be cured but which, like many illnesses, can be arrested. It may take several forms – including (but not limited to) a compulsive need for sex, extreme dependency on one person (or many), and/or a chronic preoccupation with romance, intrigue or fantasy. An obsessive/compulsive pattern, either sexual or emotional (or both), exists in which relationships or sexual activities have become increasingly destructive to career, family and sense of self-respect. Sex and love addiction, if left unchecked, always gets worse. However, if we follow a simple program that has proven successful for scores of other men and women with the same illness, we can recover. In S.L.A.A., we learn to accept the reality of having this addiction and surrender any notion that we can control it successfully on the basis of our unaided will. Admitting personal powerlessness over this affliction, we cease our addictive behavior and turn to guidance from a Power greater than ourselves, make restitution for harm done to others, and reconstruct our lives physically, mentally, spiritually and emotionally. |
What is SLAA?
SLAA is a Twelve Step, Twelve Tradition program patterned on the model pioneered by Alcoholocs Anonymous. We gather in small and large meetings to support each other and share our experience, strength and hope, especially for newcomers. A fuller description of the program can be viewed by going to the Resources tab on our Home page, clicking on the Meeting Scripts link, and under that clicking on the SLAA Preamble, which is read at every meeting and constitutes the fullest and broadest statement of purpose and the tools we use in the program. SLAA for Newcomers 7:00-7:30pm, every Tuesday BDF LGBT Center 938 The Alameda, SJ, CA 95126 If you can, please fill out the Self Diagnosis sheet and bring it to the SLAA for Newcomers meeting. It may help you to understand SLAA more clearly and allow us to discuss more with you during the SLAA for Newcomers meeting. If you can't, don't worry about it! |
Meeting Guidelines
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Some Commonly Asked Questions
Who runs the meeting? An S.L.A.A. meeting is run by its members. Typically, there is a member who guides the meeting, another who is entrusted with the group’s finances and perhaps one who orders literature for the group. These “trusted servants” are volunteers elected by group members to regular service positions that typically last six to 12 months. When do I speak? Typically, newcomers can speak at any time during the regular portion of the meeting and some meetings set aside specific time for newcomers to share. Remember you need not speak if you don’t want to. What’s with the money basket? S.L.A.A. groups are self-supporting, declining outside contributions. Our expenses, such as rent and literature, are paid by voluntary contributions from our members. We pass the basket also known as “practicing the “Seventh Tradition,” and members are encouraged to donate as they are able. No one is ever required to make any donation at an S.L.A.A. meeting. |
So, what’s this God or Higher Power talk?
S.L.A.A. is based on spiritual (not religious) principles. We have found that acknowledgement of some power greater than ourselves (Higher Power) is crucial to recovery from our self-destructive behaviors. Members are not required to adhere to any doctrine, either religious or secular. You are welcome in S.L.A.A. whether you are of any faith or of none. |